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- Gosh, I never get mail! I wonder who sent this. There's no return
address! In its place there's a crude human skull with X's for eyes and
it's tongue hanging out! Maybe it's the IRS.
- No retractable claws, no opposable toes, no prehensile tail, no compound
eyes, no fangs, no claws....... SIGHHH.... - about being human
- Ballastic missles fron God, I call them. - about rocks
- If you do the job badly enough, sometimes you don't get asked to do it
again.
- How many boards would the mongols hoard, if the mongols hordes got
bored?
- I don't take chances with a product that prints the date you might
expire. - about milk
- Curiosity is the essence of the scientific mind.
- Idiocy is the essence of the male mind. - Susie
- Little Joys of Life:
a) Reading a new comic book
b) Petting a happy dog
c) getting a letter in the mail
d) eating the marshmallows in hot chocolate
e) smiling when a big kid calls you a nasty name... and then punching his teeth straight down his ugly neck.
- The only skills I have the patience to learn are those that have no
real application in life.
- Calvin: "Can you make a living playing silly games?"
His Dad: "Actually, you can be among the most overpaid people on the planet."
- Every minute outside and awake is a good minute. - Hobbes
- Exercise is a lot more gratifying if you count what it FEELS
like.
- Susie: "You'd get a good grade without doing any work."
Calvin: "So?"
Susie: "It's wrong to get rewards you haven't earned."
Calvin: "I've never heard of anyone who couldn't live with that."
- Reality continues to ruin my life.
- The trouble is... if my program works, I won't be able to write a
sequel. - about his proposed Self-Help book
Now back to my excellent quotes page.
by Bill Watterson (All quotes from Calvin, unless noted otherwise)